The teenager is visiting his Mom tonight, so my husband and I have one of the rare occasions when we are Home Alone! As we munched our Sonic burgers, while standing at the kitchen counter, I cooed, “Honey, I like your hair, when did you get it cut?”
“Last Saturday,” he replied.
That bite of chili cheeseburger got stuck in my craw! I realized that maybe it was high time we had a [tag]romantic date[/tag]! Actually, there is no “maybe” to it—we need a date!
Fortunately, I had visited Arkie Mama’s site tonight to read her contribution to the latest [tag]Blog Blast[/tag], sponsored by Parent Bloggers and E-Harmony Marriage(there are still a few hours to write a post). The winner receives $100 AmEx gift card (for dinner) and $100 cash (for the sitter), courtesy of eHarmony. We don’t really need a babysitter, since our son is a teenager (but we could use that cash to keep him out of mischief).
I prevailed upon my husband to write his views on the subject. So, I hope you will welcome my Sweet Spousal Unit. His name is not Mr. Shelly Tucker…it’s Eric Tucker…and this is his answer to the question that Parent Bloggers posed:
You know you need a date with your husband/partner when… you’ve let real life get in the way of romance.
I don’t consider myself your classic “Bubba” type by any stretch, nor am I much of a technology-crazed geek. But Fate still caused me to end up being employed as an engineer for a company that makes Them Big Ol’ Trucks. If a geneticist ever mapped my DNA, I’m pretty certain the gene for “romanticism” would be missing… or at least it would have mutated into a form unrecognizable as such. What I mean is, I don’t consider myself to possess the innate wining, dining, and wooing skills one might associate with your “lover-boy” type. In spite of this, I somehow was able to win Shelly’s heart… and she got mine in the deal. Sometimes things work out.
I understand that most of you have small children and finding time to Make Whoopee can be a real challenge. But just wait until you have a teenager in the house; a teenager full of hormones that don’t know what to do with themselves, but by golly they want to find out. RIGHT NOW.
Did I mention I have a 16-year old son? When he plans an evening out with his buddies, well that’s great. It’s just the kind of situation where Shelly and I can feel comfortable leaving the house for a few hours of “together time” – in fact the last quality time we had together was a trip to Wal-Mart to buy an extra litter box for the cats.
But now, Dear Son has a girlfriend. And she has a driver’s license. And a car. And that girlfriend knows where my son lives. And it’s not difficult for a Worrying Parent to imagine what might happen if she paid a visit to him if Shelly and I weren’t there.
(“You were young once,” some of you might be thinking. I know I was; I remember what it was like and what thoughts occupied 95% of my waking hours. Why else do you think I’m worried?)
So having a teenage son in the house is cramping our style – a style already hampered, as I’ve said, by the woeful lack of romantic creativity on my part. We’d be lucky, though, if these were the only hindrances to our going out together.
Shelly has acquired a bit of an addiction to blogging. She begins to show withdrawal symptoms if it’s been more than three hours since she last checked her stats. And even if not for that, there’s still the Mahjongg or Spider Solitaire computer games or episodes of Ugly Betty as distractions. If I’m really going to be honest, if Shelly weren’t at the computer I probably would be, searching eBay for more cool stuff I don’t need. Or I’d be watching The Simpsons reruns or My Name Is Earl (which I also have to watch in reruns, since it was on at the same time as Ugly Betty).
It is just entirely too easy to fall victim to these distractions but Shelly and I both know how vitally important it is to plan quality time with each other. Maybe – and we hope – we’ll have our names drawn at random to win this contest and get $100 to have a real, live date.
And if we do I’d really appreciate some hints on where we could go and what we could do.
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I hope you win Eric! I know what it’s like to have teenagers cramping the romance out of a marriage. Our 17 yo is up til all hours of the night and even when we do get to go on a date he’s awake above our bedroom ~sigh~! I used to think things were tough when the kids were little…lol, no comparison.
Hey Tea. I’m not letting Eric type on Wordpress
, so this is what he said, ” Yeah, it used to be nice when you could tell him to go to bed at 9 o’clock…and he would!”~Eric
So, Eric, we finally meet. It’s exciting to read something an adored man has written (No, I don’t adore you, Shelly does, not that I wouldn’t, though) I loved your post and I hope you win. After all, someone has to drag Shelly off the computer so we can have an hour or two of less links to click on since she finds so many. In fact, if you give us advance notice ALL her regular readers could have dates with our respective significant others, if only just a quick few minutes away from the computers to hold hands. Now, what ARE you going to do with your son while you are gone?
“You would probably adore me. I don’t know if Shelly will let me read your blog to see if it would be mutual, and I MUST defer to her wisdom. As Rumpole says, ‘She-who MUST be obeyed!’ I’m not going to try to drag her off the computer! The best I can do is tempt her away. What to do with the son is a puzzle…do YOU want to babysit?~Eric”
Hi, Eric! Another of Shelly’s readers here. My hubby and I don’t have kids — we have cats, so there’s a decidedly different set of challenges there, say stepping in hairballs during amorous interludes, etc. Ha!
Good luck winning the contest — that would be great! And how fun to read your guest blog post.
“We are blessed with both the teenager and five cats. It’s very disconcerting being on the receiving end of voyeurism, even from five cats. Since all of them are ‘fixed’ it adds an element of guilt. Oh well, better five cats than twenty or thirty~Eric”
Sweet post! Ah the dreaded teenage years…
Found you via the blogblast. My entry is here:
http://mamaknj.blogspot.com/2007/06/you-know-you-need-date.html
“Thanks for stopping by to visit. I was a little nervous, since it’s my first time to write for Shelly’s blog.”~Eric
Hello Spousal Unit!!! Very nice to meet you!
What a great surprise! A guest blogger and an excellent one, to boot! (When you see your stats and comments on this piece, you’ll forget all about e-bay because you’ll have caught blogging fever!!)
I hear ya, Eric!!! My daughters are 16, 14, and 13 and my son is 11. I swear, I would have felt more comfortable leaving them home alone at the age of 4 than I do now. We don’t have “girlfriends” yet, but the boyfriends….oh, wow. The last one was afraid to come into the house to meet my hubby. 16 year old daughter said he’s “not cool” with cops.
I hear something like that and I immediately hear sirens and start thinking “PULL OVER, BUDDY!”
The hubby asked “Why? Is he wanted for something?”
Then we got yelled at because she says it’s hard enough getting asked out when your father is a cop, let alone having us chase away the ones that will go out with her by (gasp!) wanting to meet them.
Too bad! The way I figure it is she’ll thank us many, many many years from now when she’s planning romantic anniversary dates instead of conjugal visits.
Hubby thought it would be a riot to go outside, sneak up behind the car and tap on the driver’s side window with his nightstick. I agree, it would have been fun, but we controlled ourselves
My hubby’s thinking is that if you are going to father three really attractive teenaged cheerleaders, you are wise to have a profession that allows you to be armed. I can’t say I disagree
Hope you win with your article here! It’s a great one!!! If you do, I won’t offer to babysit because your son is too old for that, but we have a great surveillance package available for $100
Jessica The Rock Chick
“Good to meet you, too, Rock Chick. Thanks for your kind words (I doubt Shelly will ever move over long enough to let me see the stats). With three teenage daughters, you have it much worse than we do. I like your husband’s thinking. We may take you up on the surveillance package
”~Eric
Hello, So brave of Shelly to let you post, b/c what if you really begin to like blogging, then you will either have to wrestle for the computer or get another one.
I’ve got three teenagers here and the testosterone is clogging the air. My 16 y/o has an 18 y/o girlfriend and in my opinion, his response this morning to who slept in the tent with him last night on a school overnight was a little too long for my liking. Thank God for his 14 y/o brother who is here all the time to be a chaperone.
Romance? Definitely a tough one in our house. Even if we do go out, we usually end up at Home Depot, ooo baby, ooo baby. Good luck with the contest!
“I don’t know that we will win, but Shelly asked me to write it. I bet your older son just looooves having his little brother tagging along. You do have your share of testosterone floating around. As for me starting to blog, I doubt it, but we need another computer anyway!” ~Eric
Not only is he sweet, good looking, and smart: he can write, too! Shelly, somewhere in your wicked past, there must’ve been a moment of good
“Dawn, what are you trying to talk us into doing? We don’t babysit. Shelly has had a few good moments in her wicked past….well, there was *one*…”~Eric
Oh, I know (I hope) what are you talking about, know our daughter doesn´t live with us,she is 27, but when she was a tennager, and was in love I was terrified about leaving home and left her alone. Now, my mom is living with us, she is 92, but she can listen whatever happens around, so.. we have (my husband and me) a very few privacy. We are for 30 years married, but we know that it is very important to keep a bit of romanticism. So please Shelly, computers and blogs are quite good, but remember you have a person with whom you share many things, don´t keep him away. I am not very shure if I express what I mean. Saludos Lola.
“:lol: It’s hard having “mom” back in the house isn’t it! But, you are blessed to have her. Congratulations on 30 years of marriage AND keeping the romance. Shelly isn’t *quite* as bad as we pretend she is on the blog. That part is *mostly* story. You expressed yourself very well! Thanks for commenting.”~Eric
Excellent post! Thanks for sharing, and for letting us meet you. I don’t have any kids. But I was a very well behaved teenager, so there’s hope yet!
“Thank you for your kind words, Frigga. When you have children, you might change your thoughts
I appreciate you reading my post.”~Eric
Seems I am destined to leave a comment on your site… I came here for the Blog Blast, but then recognized your masthead from your web designer’s web site (her portfolio page) when I was browsing earlier this week. Weird!
“Shelly & I are glad you stopped by!”~Eric