Have y’all seen the little old lady in the buffet line? You know the one I mean. She drives you nuts, because she is so dadgum slow! While you stand there grumbling, she carefully fills her plate. She dawdles around while you fume. She takes a little bit of this, and a dab of that, and then some of that over there. She has to have a taste of everything. Well, just be nice to her!
That little old lady was me!
I want it all! And, that’s my problem. In my life, I fill my metaphorical plate so full that I can’t balance it.
I asked for help in finding life’s balance, proposing a group writing project, and hoped that some of you would write and give me inspiration. Evidently, the subject matter didn’t resonate with anyone except Marcia and Kate Lacy. But, I want to thank Amy Palko at Lives Less Ordinary and Jacob Share at Group Writing Projects for trying to get your attention.
It seems that there is no real answer to my questions about finding a balanced life. “Balance” seems to be a matter of perspective.
Kate dropped in and wrote a “post” in the comment section of my original post about the writing project. It’s worth skipping over there to read it. Evidently she doesn’t have a blog, but she should. At 63, Kate has experienced life, and has a lot to share. She claims that balance is a “choice,” and says:
“Imbalance is itself a gift – a moment of time moving so fast that we, as mere organisms, slow down. We are forced to take that extra breath, to endure infections that triumph over stress and fear and anger, to make hard decisions….because we are not immortals. Because tomorrows are limited and we are missing too many sunrises, too many grandchild kisses, too many inspirational scenes…”
Boy howdy, is she dead on with that?!
Marcia had an admittedly flippant answer to my questions about finding balance. She, too, believes that balance is a “choice.” She said, “You are already balanced, look at it as simply rearranging the weights one moment at a time. Make new choices – just for today, you can make different ones tomorrow and you will still live a balanced life.”
Ladies, I appreciate your insight, but it didn’t really help me solve my problem. Choice IS my problem!
I’m working hard at weighing all the choices I have made. I’m going to try to look at this “imbalance” in my life as a gift and slow down for awhile. I’m re-arranging my plate to remove some things for which I no longer have appetite. The doctor is going to do some re-arranging for me. She’s going to be making a few of my choices (and forcing some choices I don’t want). I’m going to feel like a little kid whose momma fills the plate for her. But, I’m ready to deal with it. My gentle rebellion has begun.
The first thing I’m going to do is avoid the buffet table!
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Insightful thoughts here, from so very wise ladies. I also wanted to wish you a Happy Mother’s Day.
SusieJs last blog post..I only said “I told you so” three times,
Hey Shelly–
I have to say I am guilty of not entering your writing project. It’s not that I didn’t want to, I did and I even tried to write about it, but truth be told, I am as unbalanced as you are, I think!!! I have no words of wisdom as sometimes I feel like I’m hanging off a cliff by my already bitten off fingernails!
We both suffer from Do Gooder Syndrome, too. It’s hard for me to step back when I see something I can help with or needs help, even if I don’t really have the time to do it.
All I can say is that no matter what, you have to hang in there. You never know what the future will bring!
I hope you’re having a very Happy Mother’s Day! You completely deserve it and you’re in my thoughts!
Jessica The Rock Chicks last blog post..You Are My Sunshine
Practical or not, that buffet table is going to miss you! Flippancy aside, there were a few times I filled my plate so full, I actually got sick and was forced to slow down and scrape a few things into the waste bin. Choices of any kind, especially when they are all good, are one of the hardest things to face for me – but you will succeed.
Marcias last blog post..A Quickie
Oh, that big dirty word -”Choice.” How I hate it!
Undecided, now that’s my forte. See a shirt I like in several colors, not enough money (or room at home) for all the pretty shades and I can’t make up my mind which to buy. My daughter and I go to a church dinner with the two little ones and she asks “Where do you want to sit?” I can’t answer because it makes no difference to me, overall, so I cop out and tell her, “Anywhere you want is fine with me.” But she wants me to make the decision and gets mad if I won’t, so finally I choose a table. This time it was a good choice since our table ended up being selected to go through the buffet line FIRST! Balance, choices, decisions -all things I do poorly with, dislike immensely most of the time. Probably because my life is, at this stage, still overloaded due to many poor choices made years earlier that can no longer be rectified, just deal with the consequences today.
And yet, strangely enough, I am now more content, overall, with my life than I have been since I was a child, totally unaware for the most part, of all the pitfalls ahead. Now, balance for me means I woke up today, was able to walk relatively pain free (compared to many, it would be considered TOTALLY painfree), and I am no longer worrying about the mundane choices in life any longer. Just want to keep my family -kids, grandkids -as close to my heart as possible for as long as I can. Probably makes no sense to ramble about this but it’s the way I feel these days about what is important, what is at a lower level, and enjoying whatever I can to the max.
Jeni Hill Ertmers last blog post..Dancing The Night Away!
Choices we make. Choices that are made for us. Balance. I’m not sure how we get that. I do know that I’ve really learned how to say no, and mean it. That has helped. I think really hard before investing my time in something. But it does still all seem like a giant balancing act sometimes. There is so much out there that I want to try and explore and do. Only so much time.
If you ever do find out the answer to balance, make sure to share it with us!!