Airline flights have never been comfortable for me, because we are always crammed into the cheap seats at the rear of the plane. First class seats are not reserved for the likes of us; we sit in “the peanut gallery.” But at least, back then we could occupy the time. There were magazines to read, we waited eagerly for the flight attendants to serve us beverages and a snack, or we could curl up with a pillow and blanket to get some shut eye.

That was then.

I can’t imagine that flying is comfortable at all since the changes the airlines are making to conserve fuel. Considering the price of the fare, I think they’ve gone too far.

I don’t mind them taking magazines out of the planes. Their magazines were mostly advertisement, anyway. Usually I only looked at them for the crossword puzzles; and most often someone had already partially filled the puzzle.

I don’t mind them not giving me snacks and beverages. The snacks were usually just enough to make me hungry. When I drink liquids, then I have to crawl across everybody to get to the bathroom. I have a secret fear of toilets on a plane. I’m afraid I’ll get sucked down that hole and be ejected over Milwaukee.

Taking out the pillows and blankets is where they crossed the line for me. I guess I’ll have to take an inflatable bath pillow and one of these mylar emergency/survival blankets (they only weigh 12 ounces):

Imagine trying to fold that back up on a plane!

Last week, my Sweet Spousal Unit took a business trip with several of his co-workers. Because they were planning to visit suppliers from Tijuana, Mexico to South Carolina and throughout the Midwest, the company sent them on the corporate jet. They flew out of the Denton Municipal Airport (it’s a teeny-tiny airport not far from our house). Talk about “lap of luxury!” They had comfortable seats and even had meals from Panera Bread!

While I envied his mode of travel, I wasn’t jealous of his trip. It was exhausting work. I was delighted to have him home, and he was happy to be home. I don’t know who he thought he was as he descended from the plane. He pretended to be waving to the crowd of adoring fans, but it was only me there to greet him. Don’t tell him I told you that, he’d be mortified.

Pretty cool way to travel, eh? I’d love to get that red carpet treatment when I fly. Actually, I’d just be delighted not to have to carry my own pillow and blanket.

What part of the airline’s “hospitality” will you miss most? Go ahead and tell me. It won’t make any difference, but at least you can get it off your chest.