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Abusive Muse

by Shelly Kneupper Tucker on January 17, 2009

“Talk to me.”
“I don’t wanna.”
“Say something. Anything!”
“Let’s play mahjong.”
“We’ve been playing mahjong for the last two hours. Let’s write.”
“Give me cookies first.”
“We’re on a diet … cookies aren’t good for us. Now say something.”
“There’s low-fat frozen yogurt in the freezer.”
“That’s NOT what I want you to say. Give me something I can work with.”
“Technically, you aren’t supposed to put a preposition at the end of a sentence.”
“Don’t get fresh with me!”
“If you were quick witted, you would have said, “Give me something I can work with, B**ch.’ Besides, I thought you liked it when I’m fresh.”
“That’s not the kind of ‘fresh’ I like, and you know we don’t talk like that on this blog!”
“That was your decision, not mine. I want to read a book.”
“You know we don’t have any new books around here.”
“A trip to Barnes & Noble would be nice.”
“We don’t have any money!”
“That’s never stopped you before.”
“C’mon. Let’s just write! We haven’t written in days.”
“I don’t feel like it.”
“Help me out here. I WANT to write!”
“How does it feel to want?”
“You’d better start talking, OR ELSE.”
“Or else what? You can’t make me talk.”
“I know I can’t, but won’t you please help? For me?”
“It’s not about you. It’s about ME. I’ll talk when I’m ready. You’re boring. If this is all you have to discuss, then I’m going to take a nap.”
“FINE! I’ll just go play mahjong.”
“Please, Bre’r Rabbit — don’t throw me in dat dere briar patch.”
“Muse, you are not amusing.”

Other posts you might enjoy:

  1. A New Addiction For My Muse: Facebook
  2. Excuse Me, Gotta Run
  3. The Muse Reviews A Not So Sweet Restaurant
  4. Another Argument With My Muse
  5. Bath Time Blues


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{ 9 comments }

Jamie January 17, 2009 at 6:02 pm

Having just come out of an extended period of “I don’t wanna”, you and your lazy, unproductive, and uncooperative muse have my sympathy.

Don’t waste any sympathy on HER. That’s just what she likes.

patois January 17, 2009 at 6:28 pm

Well, at least she gave you something to write about, yes?

patoiss last blog post..The Weekly Wonderings #93

I was hoping to embarrass her into talking :wink:

Marcia January 17, 2009 at 6:48 pm

Please, Shelly, tell Muse in your next conversation, I read that the preposition not being allowed at the end of the sentence was a giant hoax. Not that I remember where I read it.

Muse, don’t tell Shelly how clever I thought you were to get her to both write about you – and to play mahjong again. :grin:

Marcias last blog post..Bella, On our Watch,…
I do remember that my English teacher, Mrs. Dubois, got very angry if we used a preposition at the end of the sentence. It was something up with which she would not put. In fact, she took off her wig & threw it at me once for that very infraction. It was scary…so I try not to repeat it. The Muse didn’t have to try very hard to make me play mahjong :twisted:

Robin January 18, 2009 at 12:53 am

Oh no, you’re channeling MY muse again! Damn.

Robins last blog post..Flattery will get you everywhere
YOUR Muse talks with a definite Texas twang…and you can have her back!

Thorne January 18, 2009 at 5:06 am

Hahahaha…
I know that b*tch! Made the move over to wordpress, luv. Update me when you have a chance, please.
xoxo

Thornes last blog post..A Bit of Fun & Foolishness

I’ll do that in just a few minutes. I think EVERYBODY knows her…

carol g January 18, 2009 at 12:54 pm

I also know that blankety-blank-blank muse. I still am not forthcoming with ANY writing material. So I think I will go work on a few medicine bags… or maybe play mahjong…

carol gs last blog post..Manic Monday ~ CELL

Mahjong is good. But, I played long enough to make my vision fuzzy! Medicine bags are even more wonderful. Can you make bags while you play?:lol:

anna l'americana January 18, 2009 at 5:04 pm

And so she got you to write, didn’t she? Sneaky, huh?
I hear muses are like that.

Nice.

anna l’americanas last blog post..It’s just not that cold outside……..

She IS sneaky like that. You “hear” that they are like that? Does this mean it hasn’t happened to you? Then, I wanna be you. Wait…no…you live in Maine & have snow. Never mind.

Jessica The Rock Chick January 19, 2009 at 7:35 am

Wow! Your muse is a snappy little thing, isn’t she!!!!! I’ve been trying to get back to writing after an extended break. I’ll tell ya, the longer you go without doing it, the harder is to do!

Plus, I’ve developed this horrible Facebook addiction. It’s bad! ;)

Jessica The Rock Chicks last blog post..Life Is A Highway

Yes, and you have addicted ME to Facebook…and that’s the next post I’m going to write. I’m going to blame YOU! :lol:

Heather in Beautiful BC January 19, 2009 at 11:17 am

OMG – you made me laugh – first thing in the morning!!! My day is starting GREAT – thanks :)

And then this:

It was something up with which she would not put.

You are hilarious!!!

I have access to tons of paperback books – tell me what authors you like and I’ll see what I can find for you. It’s inexpensive to mail them via media mail.

Do you belong to ‘Book Review Bloggers’?

http://brb.thomasnelson.com/

They will send you books in exchange for your review. I’ve done 2 so far and they are good quality books :)

Have a great day!

Heather in Beautiful BCs last blog post..Shamu the Killer Whale at SeaWorld Orlando

:lol: “Up with which she would not put” is an everyday expression around here. I don’t belong to Book Review Bloggers, but that sounds interesting. Thanks for stopping by, and I’m glad I made you laugh.

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