“You woke me up at 2:30 this morning, Muse! What do you think you are doing?”
“I wanted to write a haiku.”
“Ridiculous! I need my beauty rest.”
“It doesn’t matter how long you sleep — it’s not going to help you.”
“Don’t get funny.”
“But, you always tell me you want me to be funny. Let’s just write a haiku.”
“We don’t have time.”
“Tiny green tendrils…”
“I told you we have other things to do. Do you see this list of things that have to be finished today?”
“I’d rather play in the garden. Do you see the tiny plants that are beginning to peek out of the earth? Don’t you hear the mockingbird singing?”
“You know how I feel about mockingbirds … they are as bad about letting me sleep as you are. So let’s get these contracts finished.”
“Nope. I’m writing a haiku: Tiny green tendrils, Reaching for the Sun’s bright face….”
“You’ll write a haiku when I say you can write a haiku. I have comments to answer, 3 contracts to write, and we have to change the litter box.”
“Six Flags would be more fun. Can we go to Six Flags? Can we, can we, huh?”
“Six Flags isn’t open today! Besides we can’t afford it. They charge too much for admission, and just buying a soda costs six dollars!”
“Yes, we can! Didn’t you see that the Six Flags stocks fell so low that they are no longer listed on the New York Stock Exchange? Stock shares are only a dollar! We could trade in six shares of stock and buy a small coke. I wanna ride The Sasquatch!”
“You throw up when we ride thrill rides!”
“Oh. I forgot. Well, then I’m gonna write a haiku: Tiny green tendrils, Reaching for the Sun’s bright face, Kissed by His grace.”
“That’s stupid! ‘Kissed by His grace’ is not five syllables.”
“It is if you say ‘Kiss-ed.‘ Try it like that.”
“How pretentious can you be?”
“You ain’t seen nothing yet.”
[Editor's Note: Shelly's Abusive Muse is placated with coffee and chocolate while she writes contracts, answers comments, and empties the cat litter box. She will be trying to visit blogs today, so if she hasn't commented at your place in awhile, drop her a comment and she will swing by to visit. Feel free to leave a link to one of your posts that you think seriously rocks.]
“Mmffmmlmffng!”
“Shut up and eat more chocolate. Do you think you always have to have the last word?”
“mmmff”
[sigh]
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Not all that into haikus, but I want to go to Six Flags, too, and no grown ups ever want to go with me!!! Do you think I can take your muse off your hands for a few hours when summer comes to Chicago???? She sounds like a lot of fun!
Jessica The Rock Chicks last blog post..Tweedle-lee-dee-dee-dee
You don’t want her to go with you…she throws up!
kiss-ed!!
Hahahaha! I love your muse! She cracks me up! (Her haiku was pretty cool, really…) Contracts and cat boxes must occasionally prevail. *sigh
Thornes last blog post..Judgement – The Aeon
Her haiku stunk, but she was insistent. Yep. The cat boxes definitely prevail!
LOL
6 dollars is a lot for a soda! I like to go to see the animals. Does your 6 flags have an animal kingdom? That is my favorite part(-: I don’t like rides(-:
cindees last blog post..Need ID for Wildflower Please
I imagine it does, but I haven’t been there in a loooong time. I don’t know how my Muse knows about it anymore. She’s devious, that one is.
Oh my… that muse is loose again!! Some how she can pop into your life at the most inopportune times. *sigh* I live with one also… she likes to travel — usually across country to see her grandkids. And she is ALWAYS expensive.
Carol G.s last blog post..update on renovations
Muses by definition are expensive. At least MINE is. I don’t have any grandkids, but she would adopt them if she could find them.
Twitter is having a severe Whale Fail attack so this is what I said about Susan Boyle” “She is remarkable. I understand Cowell has already got her under contract and looking for recording opportunity”
Jamies last blog post..Fleeting Footsteps
As for that muse of yours, stuff her face with left over bunny ears. She can come over and listen to Barbara Cook … another surprising voice from an 80 year old woman.
Jamies last blog post..Fleeting Footsteps
Who let the muse out of her box…this should be fun!
Sheila Atwoods last blog post..Ten Reasons I Love Firefox
*grin*, your muse has a fabulous sense of humor! And nifty that she likes gardening. I think your muse and my muse would get along fabulously.
I’m glad your garden is doing well. So is ours, I’m happy to say. Let’s hear it for rain!
Thomma Lyns last blog post..Hiking and Writing Sundries
@Thomma Lyn My muse likes to garden, but she is easily distracted! My garden is just beginning, and I didn’t plow as much ground as you did! But, I’m doing it alone, because Mr. Tucker doesn’t like to garden
. Oh well, I’m ready for some home grown tomatoes 