Indigestion pains me as I ponder whether to tell y’all about one of my least favorite restaurants in Denton, Texas. While I contemplate giving you the real truth (which isn’t good) about this restaurant off the Square, I hear a voice in my head. It’s my Muse, and she is trying to kick up trouble.
Tell ‘em! Give that restaurant Old Billy Heck! Rip into them! This is gonna be fun … Bwahahahaha!
Aww, Muse, that’s not nice. This is a kind blog … we don’t want to be mean to that poor restaurant.
Poor restaurant??? They gave you indigestion with that horrible stuff they called “food.” I told you not to go there.
You did not! You said, “Lookit, Shelly … they won a Best of Denton award from the Denton Record Chronicle, you ought to try them again.” Besides, a lot of people like the place, because it did get a Best of Denton award.
Well, you should have known better. Besides, it got “Best Bar.” Drunk people don’t care what food tastes like. Maybe you should have had a beer … or six. And besides, didn’t you remember the flies?
There weren’t any flies this time, Muse.
Nope, not even any bar flies. Hahaha! Get it? But remember those big blue flies? The ones that feast on road kill? They were outside and inside each of the last four times you visited. You didn’t go to that restaurant for TWO YEARS because of them. You whined, “I don’t like it when a fly that’s been eating dead rats squats on my table, grabs a napkin and ties it around its neck, and chows down. I just don’t want to share my meal with flies.” You always exaggerate.
If I remember correctly, Muse, you were the one who made that comment.
Oh. Well, maybe it was me, because that’s pretty descriptive. You wouldn’t have thought of that on your own. But, what about your readers? Don’t you have an obligation to them? Do you want someone to go to that restaurant and eat the food and blame us for their gastric discomfort?
Well … no,, but nobody’s going to “blame” me, if we don’t even talk about it. Besides, that restaurant is right here. What if someone gets angry about a bad review and sends their Cousin Guido to … ummm … “take care” of the situation?
Oh, nobody really has a “Cousin Guido.” Cousin Vinnie, maybe, but not Guido. Go ahead and tell them the name of the place.
I can’t tell them the name! Google will find it, then the restaurant will find it.
Show ‘em a picture then.
No!
Then, I will.
HA! And tell them that there is no “sweet water” there. And, tell ‘em about the Southwestern Pasta that was the most visually unappetizing meal you’ve seen since Mamaw gave us oatmeal with raisins. And, tell ‘em how the “sauce” on it was really soupy … and how the garlic bread was just a slice of Mrs. Baird’s bread with a lot of butter and very little garlic … and tell ‘em how the “grilled” vegetables were really “burned” vegetables.
Muse, I just can’t do that. I can’t write a review panning a local restaurant.
Fine. You are just a chicken. You are a disgrace! One of these days somebody is going to eat there and get sick, and THEN you are gonna feel bad about it. This will come back to bite you in the butt.
It might, but I’m not giving in to your mean streak.
I can’t help it, I’m always fussy when my tummy hurts. Would you get me an antacid and let me go to bed?
Whatever you want.
Oh, goody! Can we watch a pirate movie to lull us to sleep? I love pirate movies! Yarrgh!
As long as we don’t have to dress like Johnny Depp.
I prefer to dress like Keith Richards, anyway. Hey! Wait a doggone minute ….
What?
If someone gets mad you are going to blame this on ME, aren’t you?
That’s about the size of it.
Other posts you might enjoy:
- An Issue Of Respect At Wolfgang Puck’s Five Sixty Restaurant
- Al-Amir Lebanese Restaurant in Addison. I Fell For It Hookah, Line, and Sinker
- Cosmic Café Is An Out Of This World Restaurant
- Gilberto’s Restaurant in Fairfield, Texas. It’s Worth The Stop.
- My New Favorite Restaurant
![\"paperclips\"](\"http://thiseclecticlife.com/wp-content/themes/thesis_15/images/clips.jpg\")
{ 8 comments }
I love this! Inner dialog posts. I once interviewed myself in a post so there ya go! Too bad they don’t have sweetwater, I’m a sweets person!
.-= Damien S. Riley´s last blog ..Glimpses of What it’s all About =-.
I wish I could tell you it was an “inner” dialog, but I talk out loud AND The Muse talks out loud
Is that why people look at me funny?
Thanks, Shelly (and Muse)! Your review got my Monday morning off to a great start. If I’m ever in Denton, I’ll be sure to steer clear of the restaurant in the photo.
.-= Van Sutherland´s last blog ..The Long Road =-.
If you come to Denton, you and Chris had better holler at me. I can find you a restaurant you would enjoy. This one? It will be more than two years before I’m willing to try it again. I still have gastric distress this morning.
I’m so glad your muse isn’t afraid to tell the untarnished truth! At least the two of you have a great time together.
.-= Susie @ A Slice of my Life´s last blog ..Catching Up With College Chat =-.
Bwahaha! Oh, Susie. My Muse is not always a “great time.” She can be a Royal Pain, but she does lay it on the line
The photo alone tells me that this does not look like a good place to eat, and I’m nowhere near Denton. It just goes to prove that our stomachs and taste buds have minds of their own, irrespective of what others may say. There is no accounting for taste.
Know what to order when forced into a bad seafood restaurant? Double order of shrimp cocktail, salad and dessert. Darn hard to muck that up. You’ll be the happiest diner at your table.
Yeah, Joy. I don’t know how it got best bar, but there are always a lot of folks there. Maybe I’m just too picky? Could be.
Comments on this entry are closed.