Someone once told me, “If you put your brain in a blue jay it would fly backwards!” I don’t think they were being complimentary. But, don’t y’all believe that flying backwards would be a handy skill for a bird to have? At least I’m betting that there is one cardinal in my yard who wishes she had my brain.
She was zipping through the air, faster than a speeding bullet, while chasing a flying insect. BAM! She ran smack dab into my office window! I ran over to her and she was a pathetic sight: all crumpled on the ground with an “X” on each eye just like in the cartoons. I kid you not.
I didn’t want to get too close, because I didn’t want her to struggle and hurt herself more. However I felt it was my duty to stand over her to keep feral cats away until she had a chance to recover … or die, so I could toss her over the fence give her a proper burial. It took her a full thirty minutes to finally regain her senses (what little she had in the first place) and she flew back into the cover of the trees.
Sure the windows are dirty, but focus on the pretty blue bottles.
This little episode got me thinking about my dirty windows. That window was NOT clean, and even a blind monkey should have seen it. I don’t know why the bird didn’t see the obstruction. I don’t know about y’all, but I don’t do windows. Sure, I admire houses that have sparkling clean windows that let the light stream inside, but I’ve never felt the necessity to have that for myself for several reasons:
- First of all, those clean windows allow you to have a view of your yard. I don’t need that kind of guilt! I know my yard needs to be trimmed … actually, I need a Bush Hog® to just mow it down! Better yet, I should pave it over and make a parking lot so I wouldn’t have to worry about fire ants and poison ivy. Yessiree, I can do without a view of my yard.
- Second, if I can see out then my neighbors can see in! This is a concept that should be readily apparent to a reasonably intelligent person, but apparently I don’t fit into that subset of the population. I learn things the hard way.
Long ago I had a huge picture window in the living room of my house on Main Street in a small town. One day, I was mortified when a driver on the street waved at me as I sat in my living room. You see, I had the habit of running around the house in just a t-shirt and underdrawers, because it never occurred to me that people could see. Duh!
Fortunately, as I said, I was sitting down at the time so they didn’t view me in all my glory. But, I darned sure changed my habits after that. My solution was to buy some brand new fancy underdrawers … because it was cheaper than curtains.
- The third through seventh reasons are my cats. I have five felines who would consider a clean window a dare. They would have them smeared with nose prints in a heartbeat. Why bother?
- Of course, the eighth reason is that I am lazy.
Now, I can add number nine (which I’ve been told is the magical number of “completion”):
- If my windows were clean, imagine how many birds would smack right into them! I don’t have time to stand guard over that many avian idiots.
If you are frowning and “tsk tsking” me because you keep clean windows, I respect your right to have them. But, my windows aren’t going to be cleaned until my lottery ticket matches all the numbers … or until birds fly backwards.
Other posts you might enjoy:
{ 6 comments }
Ahhhh, Shelly, I love you!!! I’m a smudgy window person for the same 8th reason you are, I am too lazy to do it. They just get all dirty again anyway!!!
When the Universe wants the windows clean … it will rain
I’m glad you watched over the cardinal. They may be evolutionarily challenged by glass, but they’re cool looking birds. Now had it been a white-winged dove or grackle… Let’s just say, I would have been calling all feral cats in the neighborhood just in case they might be interested in a new plaything.
And we keep our windows ‘smudged’ just so we don’t run into them!
.-= Van Sutherland´s last blog ..Capital MetroRail, one more time… =-.
I wouldn’t have let the feral cats get a grackle, either. But, I probably wouldn’t have worried so much over one
You are a girl after my own heart…for the dirty windows and the blue glass bottles. I don’t do windows either and I am just plain lazy when it comes to that chore. My sweetie pie will break down and do them (he also washes dishes).
I have blue glass bottles in my window. I love how the sun shines through.
When it comes to dead birds and the windows I just have to count them up as collateral damage. We have hundreds of birds in our yard and every once in a while they decide to come in the house the hard way.
.-= Sheila Atwood´s last blog ..Herb Container Gardening – Container Herb Garden =-.
I need to borrow your “sweetie pie”
Actually, my own husband will wash dishes and do many other chores, but windows aren’t high on his list either.
I’m afraid that I won’t look at dead critters around here as “collateral damage.” That tender heart of mine even worries about the insects. It’s sad … but what are ya gonna do? It’s just the way I am.
Comments on this entry are closed.