I’ve been to enough outdoor festivals that I should know these things by heart.

Items to take to an outdoor festival:

• chair
• camera
• binoculars
• blanket or jacket
• bottled water
• sunscreen
• mosquito repellent
• antihistamine!
• taser gun for zapping unruly crowds!

I know them, but I still forget.

I had told y’all about the horrible crowds at the Denton Arts and Jazz Festival. On Friday night, throngs of idiots who arrived late scrambled to stand in front of the stage, blocking the view for the people who had been there all day waiting to see. I had groused that I was going to take an umbrella to jab offensive people, but Jamie had suggested tasering folks and stacking them like cordwood.

I’m happy to report that the Saturday night crowd was much more civilized. Or, maybe the police just had it figured out better, and stopped people from going down to the front. At any rate, the taser gun I dragged along was unnecessary (but impressive). However, I forgot antihistamine and a jacket! When we went down to the festival grounds, it was hot (so we were in our free t-shirts provided by Jupiter House Coffee). By nightfall, the temperature dropped dramatically. The freshly mowed lawn put a lot of pollen in the air (as if there isn’t enough of that in the air in Texas already).

By the time my hero, Delbert McClinton, came on stage, my teeth were chattering and I couldn’t breathe through my nose!



[photo by Matthew Barnes]

The worst news, is that if I had not already been a Delbert McClinton fan, THIS concert would NOT have made me one. Bless his heart, Delbert has been performing since the early 1960s. When he ripped into a song, he could rock the house. His voice has been abused mightily over the years.

I was mortified for him. I had been bragging on and on to the woman next to me about how good Delbert was, since she had never heard him. As the concert began, I wanted to swallow my tongue. He sounded weak, and ragged. He couldn’t carry a melody! Aww, say it ain’t so! No, it’s true.

Maybe it was an aberration. Perhaps he has allergies, too. It could have been that he was exhausted. It might have been that the sound system had a glich. Or, was it just my ears?

I don’t think so. If that is how he sounds all the time, somebody needs to tell him that it’s time to retire. I think his voice is dead and gone (R.I.P.).

The woman next to me was less than impressed. She left after three songs. We waited until he took a break. I should have gone sooner, because I don’t want to remember Delbert that way.

At least I got to hear him in road houses and honky tonks thirty years ago. That Delbert is still my hero.

That’s the tune I’m singing, folks. I’m so disappointed. We went to the Denton Arts and Jazz Festival, but came home early. The music was stellar, but I don’t “do” uncivilized crowds very well.

Oh, at first it was fine. We arrived at about 5:45, and staked out a small area about 15 yards from the stage. We spread a sleeping bag, and put down our two chairs (low to the ground, so that people can see over us, because we are polite like that). We enjoyed Metzler’s Barbecue and a beer

then some fabulous strawberry crepes, while we listened to the NTSU 1 o’clock lab band.

The 1 o’clock lab band is magnificent. It always comprises the best of the music students at North Texas State University. Did you know that such diverse musicians as Don Henley, Meatloaf, Stan Kenton, and Pat Boone went to North Texas State University? Yep. We are talking a high quality, “class act.” And, we were having a good time listening to their jazz music.

I wandered around a little looking at crafts in the sea of booths. Good thing I didn’t take my wallet!

Then, the Buster Brown Band played a set.

I was pretty impressed. They rocked! They played some of their own music, but also some wonderful tunes like Curtis Mayfield’s “Superfly.” I was having a good time!

Hey, for a free concert, this was about as good as it gets.

Unfortunately, that was as good as it got.

I’d been excited about seeing the Neville Brothers, but when they came on stage is when people started getting totally rude. They pushed their way to the front and stood in front of people who had been sitting for hours waiting to see the band.

Of course, people on the front row couldn’t see, so they had to stand. The people behind them couldn’t see, so they had to stand. In order to see Aaron Neville (sigh), I had to be on my feet! I was not amused.

Do you see all those bobble heads in front of me??! OMG, do you see Aaron Neville (squeal!)?

I got even less amused, when stupid drunken people decided to step across our sleeping bag (spilling beer all over it) instead of walking behind us. We scooted as far forward as we could to leave an aisle behind, but newcomers filled the space. I thought I was gonna have to smack one smart aleck little toot who almost wouldn’t let me move my purse out of the way before he pushed in front of us.

Maybe I’m just getting old, but it seems to me that the festival’s organizers could arrange that better. Maybe they could delineate a space in front, where people sit, and make the “standing room only” crowd be at the back. Is that so unreasonable?

We got disgusted enough to move outside of the festival ground to listen for awhile, but then we just came on home.

Strangest thing, on my back porch, I can hear the music very well, and I can see the stage as well, too. Which means I can’t see it at all.

Delbert McClinton plays on Saturday night. I may have to take an umbrella to prod people who offend me.

I make a pretty good curmudgeon.

But, I distinctly heard that smart aleck little boy call me something else. It started with a “b” and rhymed with “itch.” I do so hope he comes around again when I have my umbrella.

You thought that was going to be a joke didn’t you?

It’s not! I’ve been planning this post for awhile, and want to put it on-line before the Sunday edition of a very special comic.

On St. Patrick’s Day, I got this bit of blarney in my inbox:

Howdy!

I realize this is kinda tacky of me, but I was hoping you might check out my site, Blue House Comics.com. It’s a webcomic that my roommate and I publish and we’ve been working pretty hard on it for about a year now.

Anyway, whether you mention us or not, we just launched a new site and would love for you to see what you think.

Also, we’re both lifelong Texans from Houston living in College Station attending A&M… lol, if that helps any

but anyway, we love your site, and thanks for taking the time to read this.

-Shawn

They love my site?

I bet they say that to all the girls. But, they said the magic word: “Texan.” Fortunately, I was in a good mood when I received this bit of spam. I say “fortunately,” because I visited their website and it is delightful.

I admit that I opened the site expecting either porn or juvenile humor. Instead I found well crafted artwork and some darned funny cartoons. A lot of it is “college humor,” and I’m too old to get it. Quite a bit of it transcends their very young ages. Some of it is funny enough to make me snort coffee out of my nose.

It seems to have several sections to it. There is the main portion, called Blue House comics, which mostly features two young men who look suspiciously like the caricatures of Shawn and his roommate, Sterling. Shawn, who is a finance major, writes the comics. Sterling is a landscape architecture major, and he draws the comic and the artwork on the site.

This is The Adventuresome Toad, who at times seems to be a somewhat snobby lush. Other times, he’s just an elitist.

There are plans for a blog by a young man named John, who is a sous-chef in Pittsburgh. He will write about cooking and recipes and the life of a chef in a restaurant. It doesn’t have many entries at this point.

Under construction is an element of the site called “Tech Know,” which will be written by Jared, another roommate (and the site designer for the comic). It will include “tech-stuff and programming.”

Shawn tells me,

“Later we’re hoping to introduce user generated content to the site (such as enabling people through on-site tools to create their own comics and then hold contests for the best comic once per month).

We want to keep our site friendly to a general audience. There is no shortage of webcomics on the internet, but there is a shortage of webcomics that have generally appropriate content. We are huge fans of comics like Peanuts, Calvin and Hobbes and really admire the business savvy of Garfield creator, Jim Davis. Ultimately we have a vision of our comic (perhaps too grandiose) where we bring that sort of comic strip to the new age on the internet. That’s our passion anyway. (That’s why we’ve designed the site to feel like you’re reading a newspaper on a breakfast table- to evoke the more traditional age of comic strips).

Finally, we want our site to reach out to more of an international audience. I have a huge passion for meeting people from different cultures and travel and the internet is a great way to reach other cultures. We don’t currently have any particular steps to this end, but it’s something that’s on our hearts and we’ll try to integrate in the future.”

What’s not to love about energetic, enthusiastic kids who are fans of Charlie Brown?

Ah, the idealism of youth! I hope they achieve their goals. They are working hard on it, and I do enjoy visiting their website. My only complaint is that I find it difficult to navigate. Being a blogger, I’m accustomed to that list of posts on the sidebar, and I don’t like having to search on an archive page. That’s a small complaint!

I hope some of you will check out the site. Again, that’s Blue House Comics. There is no place for “comments,” but if you have something to say, I bet you could tell them right here. They’d love to hear from you.

Heck no, this isn’t paid advertising. But, Shawn…you could work on my taxes, Sterling can landscape my lawn, John could whip up a fancy-schmancy meal or two, and Jared could help me with some of my WordPress issues. Then, I think we’d be about square.

How many Aggies does it take to make a comic? Three or four (if John attended A & M). These kids may be funny, and they may be Aggies, but they are no joke.