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Silly Is My Middle Name

My Muse, Or Inner Child, Loves The Library

January 9, 2010

[Editor's Note: There is a "voice" that talks to me inside my head ... some would postulate that there are several voices in there. The one I recognize, I call Muse, but other people might call Her the "Inner Child." She is definitely that. Talking to Her is a bit like talking [...]

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Defining Myself With Wordle

November 24, 2009

Do y’all ever get introspective? I’m going through that right now. It seems as if I “morph” every seven years or so and become a different person altogether. When that happens, I’m worthless as a writer, so this morning I’ve just been playing. After reading a post by Israeli Mom, [...]

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There Is A Worm In My Apple: Bookworm!

October 13, 2009

If the board game “Boggle” and the video game “Tetris” had a “nooner” at the Motel Six, the resulting “love child” would be an application for my iPhone called “Bookworm.”
I have done it again! I’ve gained another addiction! Was it not enough that I am addicted to bacon? To coffee? To [...]

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Julie & Julia Gave Me A Blogging Idea!

September 9, 2009

Raise your hand if you saw the movie Julie & Julia. What? You missed it? I consider it “a must see” for all bloggers. It will instill in you all over again that desire for the elusive satisfaction of being a successful blogger. It’s going to inspire thousands of folks [...]

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Dirty Little Secret

September 3, 2009

I’m a Judge Judy Junkie.
There. I said it. I have to tell y’all that I am relieved to have finally “outed” myself by telling you my dirty little secret. For two and I half years I have tried to deceive you into believing that I’m all good and kind. I’ve tried [...]

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I Want To Be Queen

July 1, 2009

I have to tell y’all that bacon is the reason I get out of bed in the morning. Well, that and I have to pee (which was probably more information than you wanted to read). This morning I awoke and found my pillow drenched with drool, because I had been dreaming about fried [...]

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If Wishes Were Horses

May 26, 2009

My Papaw didn’t take too much stock in “wishes.” He always said, “If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.” Papaw had other colorful phrases, as well. He said, “IF a frog had wings, it wouldn’t bump its butt when it hops.” He didn’t like us to use the word “if.” [...]

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Up, Up, And Away

May 18, 2009

I was not a Boy Scout, so the motto “Be Prepared” never imprinted itself on my brain. I was only in Camp Fire Girls, and our motto was “WoHeLo,” which means “Work, Health, Love.” The “work” and “health” part didn’t imprint either, but I digress.
Mr. Tucker and I went to get coffee a [...]

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My Muse Assures Me That Grief Is Good

April 30, 2009

[Editor's note: If you have been here before, you might know that my Muse is just ONE of the voices that talk regularly in my head. This isn't our first conversation. The Muse is a bit childish. She loves to play dress up, go out and play or shop, eat chocolate, [...]

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We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Waterboards

April 28, 2009

As more information comes to light about the heinous waterboard torture used on suspected terrorists, it is obvious to me that it is time women were running this country. We would never need to resort to any form of torture that violates the Geneva Convention. Women are much more creative. Witness the [...]

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BACON Camp? In San Francisco!

March 19, 2009

Did anybody win the lottery last night? Does anybody want to sponsor me? I NEED FUNDING NOW! Somebody help me out here. Nobody told me there is a “Bacon Camp” in San Francisco! As if I needed another reason to want to go to San Francisco!
YES! And, it’s coming [...]

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Kleenex Stock. Snot A Bad Idea.

November 17, 2008

I tell you what!
Did y’all know that if you mix Vick’s Vapo Rub, Hall’s Mentho-lyptus cough drops, and chai tea you get toxic vapors? You dang sure do…and that’s what I’ve been inhaling for several days. Don’t anybody light a match!
Being slathered up with Vapo Rub has its advantages:

After awhile, I don’t [...]

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Amish Cell Phone

May 3, 2008

When it comes to the use of a cell phone, I’m a dinosaur. I don’t need bells and whistles, and I don’t ask much from my cell phone. All I want to do is be able to make telephone calls with ease. When are the cell phone companies going to cater to [...]

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Yoga to Relieve My Stress? Not for THIS Wimp.

April 19, 2008

Hi.
My name is Shelly, and I’m a stress addict.
In unison, everyone, “Hi, Shelly.”
Yes, folks. I don’t know how it happened. I just had a couple of projects going, and added a couple more. I have deluded myself into thinking that having several things going at a time keeps me interested and focused. [...]

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Because I’m Crazy

December 11, 2007

Someone didn’t get the memo. Or, the “meme-o,” as it were. I prefer not to do “memes.” I talk about me-me-me all the time anyway. But, Crank Mama passed one to me, and she’s a sweetheart, so just for her I’ll crank this one out (I just wanted to use a [...]

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For the Moms (and anyone who ever had one)

September 27, 2007

My friend Connie sent me the link to this in an e-mail, and I thought it was hilarious so I had share it with you. The performer says she figured out what a Mom would say in a 24 hour period and condensed it into 2 minutes and 55 seconds. She sings it to [...]

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Eight Things I Wish I Knew In College

June 30, 2007

Some time back I was asked to list eight things I wish I had known in college. My friend Damien, at Riley Central, for some reason thought I’d have something to share about that. I’ve been avoiding answering, because I hated to have to admit that I was in college for a very [...]

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One Last “MeMeMe” Meme

May 27, 2007

Y’all for the life of me I can’t figure out why anyone wants to know more about me. I’ve admitted more to you than I told my shrink (yeah, I went to one for awhile because it was fashionable and I didn’t have any better sense than to waste my money). You can [...]

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Thursday Thirteen—The Saga of the Hotel from Hell

May 23, 2007

Folks, I try really hard to get along with the world. I don’t get angry quickly, but when I do it isn’t pretty. I have told y’all that I travel for a living; I settle into my hotel room for a week, and that is my “sanctuary.” There isn’t anything glamorous about travel [...]

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Visualize Whirled Peas

May 14, 2007

Sorry. The Spousal Unit read my last post and suggested this. We couldn’t resist.

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